Thoughts on the Israel-Hamas War

Meagan Marsh, MSW, LCSW & Jaclyn Clarke, MA, LCPC

We wanted to reach out given everything occurring with the ongoing Israel-Hamas war, and acknowledge the heaviness you and loved ones may be feeling directly and indirectly, as well as client sessions that may be focused around the topic that can be challenging.

Times of war are fraught with many difficult and complex emotions and we plan to use next week’s small groups to hold space to process feelings, thoughts, and concerns in a safe and non-judgmental environment.

We’ve included some resources below we hope are helpful, and are open to learning of ones you’ve found helpful personally and/or professionally.

Podcast option – How to talk to children about the violence in Israel and Gaza

Israel Gaza war: History of the conflict explained – BBC News

Ways you can take to take care of yourself when tragedy strikes:

1. Acknowledge your emotions: Allow yourself to feel the range of emotions that come with the tragedy. It is normal to feel sadness, anger, fear, or confusion. Give yourself permission to experience these emotions without judgment.

Utilizing a ‘mantra’ to remind yourself that your feelings are real and that your emotional reactions are valid may be helpful. Examples include, “My feelings are justified.” “I deserve to be safe.” “This event does not decrease my value.”

Remember that you have the right to have thoughts and feelings related to a tragic event, even if it’s overseas, and even if you were not directly affected.

2. Talk about it: Even when the trauma is something that is being talked about publicly, it is important to talk to others about how you are affected. Talk to people who feel safe for you.

Connect with friends, family, or community members who may be going through a similar experience. Sharing your feelings and thoughts with others can provide comfort and a sense of solidarity. Seek professional help if needed, such as therapists or counselors who specialize in trauma.

3. Limit exposure to media: Constant exposure to news and social media coverage of the tragedy can intensify feelings of distress. Following tragedies, televisions, computers, and smartphones inundate us with reactions, opinions, and rehashing of events.

While it is important to stay informed, monitor your media exposure, be mindful of how it impacts you, and unplug as needed. Set time limits, choose reliable sources, be selective with content, avoid graphic/distressing images, take regular breaks, and engage in alternative activities.

Remember, it is essential to strike a balance between staying informed and protecting your mental well-being. Adjust your media consumption based on your emotional needs, and prioritize self-care during this challenging time.

4. Practice self-care activities: Engage in activities that bring you comfort and relaxation. This could include exercise, meditation, deep breathing exercises, journaling, listening to music, calling a friend, spending time with someone you care about, or engaging in hobbies that you enjoy. Taking care of your physical and mental health is crucial during difficult times. Remember, that what may have been helpful to you in the past, may not be what works best in this new moment.

5. Utilize grounding or relaxation techniques when feeling overwhelmed:

THE 5-4-3-2-1 COPING TECHNIQUE FOR ANXIETY
This coping technique can help you to regain focus on the present situation and calm you down.

This grounding technique uses your five senses to focus on the moment you are in and helps you to avoid anxious or stressful thoughts that might make the situation worse. This technique asks you to find five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.

BOX BREATHING FOR STRESS REDUCTION
You may have heard that deep breathing helps when you feel stressed. Box breathing is a type of deep breathing you might do in a yoga class. Just as a box has four sides, here you breathe in four steps:

• Breathe in slowly for four counts
• Hold your breath for four counts
• Breathe out slowly for four counts
• Hold your breath for four counts
• Repeat the sequence as many times as needed

There are several Apps that can assist listed in resources below.

6. Maintain a routine: Establishing a daily routine can provide a sense of stability and normalcy amidst chaos. Stick to regular sleep patterns, eat nutritious meals, and engage in activities that bring structure to your day.

7. Engage in acts of kindness: Helping others can be therapeutic and provide a sense of purpose. Volunteer your time or resources to support those affected by the tragedy. Acts of kindness not only benefit others but also contribute to your own healing process.

8. Seek solace in community: Sharing your grief and supporting others can foster a sense of unity and healing. Tragic news can make people feel powerless and discouraged. Gathering with others and taking action in the community can help work through these emotions. Coming together reminds us we are not alone and that we have support.

Connect with your community by attending support groups, vigils, or memorial services. Engaging in constructive action can make us feel helpful and empowered in a meaningful way.

9. Practice self-compassion: Be gentle with yourself and treat yourself with kindness. Healing takes time. Avoid self-blame or judgment for your emotions or reactions. Consider journaling to process your feelings and gain insights into your own journey.

Remember, everyone copes with tragedy differently, so it is essential to find what works best for you. If you find that your emotions are becoming overwhelming or interfering with your daily life, do not hesitate to seek professional help.
*source: https://www.jfsmetrowest.org/ways-to-support-yourself-your-loved-ones-and-your-community/”

From Jaclyn:
I gathered these resources to learn more about how to support parents and families affected by the war in Israel. I have shared some content with families of clients who feel affected and wanted to pass on the information in case there was going to be an email template sent for clinicians to send to families for support options.

https://www.unicef.org/parenting/how-talk-your-children-about-conflict-and-war

Article with age-appropriate language to use depending on the child’s age–https://www.kveller.com/how-to-talk-to-kids-about-whats-happening-in-israel-right-now/

Article by same author that she co-wrote with her third grade son–https://www.kveller.com/heres-how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-the-violence-in-israel-and-gaza/

Podcast option–https://www.npr.org/2023/10/12/1196977971/how-to-talk-to-kids-about-the-violence-in-israel-and-gaza